hair history highlights

My hair is not normal. I've always known it, but today I realized that my talks with strangers include my hair more often than my name. It's a conversation-starter, really. Following suit, these "hair history highlights" (no pun intended) answer my most Frequently Asked Questions as well as a few extras:

• 1981, born with curly hair compliments of both my parents
• roll hair up in a round brush (haven't we all done that?) at the age of 4, older brother to the rescue with scissors while mom sleeps
• start "styling" my own hair in 2nd grade, my favorite "do" being one side half-up with a green-and-black-polka-dot-ribbon-adorned barrett
• bangs, edition one, start in 4th grade and continue through 6th in a fluff-up, to-the-side number
• my hair-referring nickname "Mushroom" (as conceived by the older brother and friends) overtakes the elementary schoolbus
• curl and frizz take a drastic turn for the worse in junior high
• mousse is introduced for the first time in the summer after seventh grade, and immediately applied to:
• the 8th grade "year of the bun," a tightly-combed version of the ballerina with a twist and a favorite navy scrunchie. every day.
• bangs are reintroduced in ninth grade and (unfortunately) continue through early senior year (see picture at right); this time with a 1 1/2 inch barrel curling iron and 30 minutes of frustration each morning
• mousse in its modern form is adopted freshman year in the form of "Wednesdays only," later extended at the encouragement of friends
• Costco's solitary mousse option is Herbal Essences, securing my allegiance at an early age
• as a soph, I take on the first of two "bets" with my dad to go mousse-free for one week (he likes the "natural"). Conditions include: no ponytails, no disclosing payment, bangs ok.
• five total "straight hair!" events include: 1. fall formal, sophomore year (4.5 hours worth of hair-blow drying and flattening irons*); 2. fall formal, junior year (2.5 hours worth of flattening irons*); 3. senior year "crush party," in efforts to play the part of Demi Moore (2 hours, technique perfected); 4. by stylist in Mexico in the fall of 2004 (4 hrs due to the guy's inexperience with a blow-dryer); and 5. Thursday! (1.5 hrs with just a blow-dryer but a lot of ripped-out hair).
• "big hair" has made the calendar just once (ghetto formal 2004**) and is not expected to return without enormous compensation

I've scientifically tested every mousse brand on earth and am an Herbal Essences loyalist, so my latest challenge has been its inavailability here in Spain. I strategically request a can or two of every visitor- whether or not I know them- and have worked up a decent stockpile for the moment.

Good thing, or it'll be a return to the bun.

*special thanks to Meri, KT
**frizzing by Kristy and KT